General Surgery Preliminary Intern, Newark Beth Israel, New Jersey
“Our entire hospital is now a COVID-19 unit. It happened so fast. Overnight. … I’m
in a 14-bed ICU managed by the surgery team. We have PACU and same-day surgery nurses,
none of whom are trained in ICU levels of care, all of whom are unbelievable. The
team consists of an anesthesiologist running the ICU, me, one resident, an intern
who is going into radiology, ortho PAs, neurosurgery PAs and nurse anesthetists. …
Tensions could be so high, and people could snap. But I have not experienced a second
of negative energy. It’s nothing but positive, optimistic teamwork, and it makes it
all worth it. … I’m so grateful that I had a month of ICU. The ICU team at my hospital
has done a great job in training us and getting us ready for this. … I’m getting the
sickest patients in the hospital, and I try to FaceTime with their families every
day. … I lost seven patients in the last five days. These patients will go directly
from us down to the morgue. We have to talk to their families to see where they want
their remains to go. … I stand with my patients as they are dying, and I hold their
hand and say, ‘You are not alone. I’m with you. We are here with you. Your daughter
loves you so much, your son loves you so much.’ And I just repeat it over and over
until they pass, so that when I call their family members, I can tell them I did that
much. … I feel like I’m at war. When I’m home, I can’t get that vision out of my head—of
standing in the middle of the unit. I’m having a hard time sleeping. But I have such
a wonderful support system: my program director, the chair of my department, the head
of nursing. The president and CEO of our hospital has organized the Newark Police
and Fire Departments to assemble outside our hospital with all the cop cars and fire
trucks and salute us and tell us how much they appreciate us as healthcare workers
on the front line. … I do believe PCOM prepared me for this moment. Sometimes I took
courses that made me think, ‘We’ll never need this. Why are we doing this?’ I am ready
and able to handle this time of pandemic emotionally. I feel very, very blessed. …
I’m going to be a very well rounded radiologist (my ultimate goal), that’s for sure.
Lord willing.”
As told to Janice Fisher
April 16, 2020
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